What to compare and why not?
Yes, It's right; what (or whom to compare) and why not?
We live in a world of the duality of day and night, positive and negative, tall and short, fast and slow, good-bad, hot and cold.
We perceive and make sense of the world because of its opposite. We cannot define hot if we do not refer to cold or something tall if it isn't related to something short.
The world is relative. Everyone and everything relates to something.
We need a point of reference to being able to measure or in this case, compare.
A comparison is useful in a particular aspect and detrimental in others.
COMPARISON TO GROW:
We are continually comparing things and people. Every time we choose, we compare between two or more parts to make up a choice.
Comparing is useful when we compare likes.
Hold on did I say likes?
No, I don't mean social media likes. I say to compare like with like.
I see a comparison in three ways.
1. If I need to purchase something or receive a service, to get the best out of it, I compare quality and quantity. I compare two professionals and the service they offer and cost to make up my mind and have the best service rendered to me based on what I value.
Mind that in NLP there is a metaprogram about a choice that is quality against quantity. If I am looking at volume, then I would go with the least expensive, instead if quality I would look at different aspects.
To compare like to like is a good thing!
2. Another useful way of comparing is me against me.
How is that? To become aware of my growth, I have to compare certain aspects of my business or life with the data that I have available. From the bank account to my energy or free time. Anything that can give me factual information of what I am looking at. I can measure my weight to see if I lose weight or gained it depend on what I want.
Writing in a journal is an excellent way of learning about personal growth. Reading about yourself allows you to compare your mindset, your value and help you become aware of where you are at, it's a great thing.
3. In the last point, what a person should not be comparing, is oneself against another.
Example me as a coach or restaurateur against other coaches or restaurateurs.
In this case, comparison can be detrimental. Either positive or negative.
Is detrimental because it is conjecture. You don't have the complete information, even if you look at data.
Each story of us it's unique. Each one of us is unique, in our thinking, meanings, values, beliefs, attitudes, behaviours, motivations.
It is not possible to enter someone else's mind. It is already challenging to know about our own.
You cannot know how much work another person that is apparently in the same position as you, industry, or presupposed mastery, have done to be there.
A person that might seem more successful, wealthy or free. The inner world most often is not aligned with the outer world of appearance.
Comparison with others brings about suffering. You might get inspired by someone else's that seems in a better position than yours. You can model this person, study him/her, learn about the habits if you inspire to be the same.
Time and experience are for each one of us different and everything that we measure is a perspective and subjective experience.
You can't compare the subjectivity of speed, time, length and temperature with someone else's.
Be who you are and don't pretend who you are not. Use the right emotion and act on things that are meaningful to you.
Give your gift to the world and be free of your judgment.